Baby Patrick's Birth Story
- TheQueen
- Sep 16, 2018
- 24 min read
Patrick’s Birth:
Friday 9/14 41w1d
9am I went in for my weekly check up and was told today was the day...we were being induced. I immediately panicked...my team isn't here! However after some discussion we realized this was also the best way for me to avoid any male providers as the male OB wasn't working until Monday evening. So with that I agreed she was right about the timing.
Tomek stayed home with me from work, we went out to breakfast and dinner together, we rested (I managed a short nap despite nerves), had cuddle time, and mentally prepared for the evening.
8pm Tomek and I went in for my natural induction. We arrived at the hospital the same as week 40: 1cm dilated, 50% effaced. The reason I pushed for a natural induction is I didn’t want a medicated birth, pitocin contractions, or an epidural. If you read previous blogs I refer to this as the natural birthing community does, the waterfall effect.
Thankfully our OB was 100% on board with this and so we did what they call a CRB or Cervical Ripening Balloon induction. This method inserts a balloon into the cervix and vaginal area and applies pressure. After about 12 hours they remove it and you should be dilated to a 4 or a 5. It definitely takes longer BUT is a natural method that doesn't lead to all the other pieces I wanted to avoid so I was more than happy to wait out the 12 hours.
So we went in and I guess I had gotten confused. I was a bit upset. I was being induced and my OB would not be working with me at all through the entire process. This was even more upsetting when OB #1 came in and did the first cervical exam so aggressively I was in shock, I bled on the bed and was just sitting there stunned. Later she told me that she was a bit more aggressive trying to sweep the membranes (thanks for the warning?!).
I sat there upset telling my husband that I made a mistake. I shouldn't have asked for the extra week. If I hadn't then I would have my OB, my primary doula, and our photographer all there...none of which we had now. But I relaxed and realized this was God's plan...and that no matter how much planning I did I was not able to perfectly control this situation anymore (and maybe I never had any control of it anyway).
10:30pm OB #1 (I didn't ask any of them permission to insert names so I'm not, my apologies) came in and the CRB was inserted. Then we just were waiting it out. At this point the CRB adding pressure was creating some contractions, and of course the goal of dilation but nothing unbearable. We both attempted to sleep while we were able. Easier for Tomek than me as the nurse, Felicia, had to come in every hour to check my CRB, and they had me hooked up to monitors for the time being.
Saturday 9/15 41w2d
7:20am: For us we had 9 hours and the CRB fell out. Fell out is an understatement. I still am dying laughing about it. I had gotten up through the night repeatedly with no problems and a nurse (Felicia introduced me to Jessica) came in for a shift change, told me that she would return to do her initial assessment, and that now would be a good time to go pee before. She had just written the goals for her shift on the board (1. Remove CRB 2. Have a Baby!).
I went into the bathroom and sat on the toilet to pee….the CRB fell out into the toilet! It just plopped out….I immediately go….”OH SHITTT!” Tomek asks if I am okay and I explain and tell him to page the nurse! I am totally trapped on a toilet with this taped to my leg but sitting in a toilet of urine. Talk about learning really fast to be comfortable with your helpers...Felicia hadn't left yet so she came back in, I explained to her and she told me I could just untape it and she would fish it out. Poor Felicia...these ladies are marvelous women for all they do!! She actually had never seen a CRB after it came out because she works nights so she was actually excited to see it. She was such a character, we loved her! So, we officially took 9 hours to go from 1cm dilated and 50% effaced to 5cm dilated with the same effacement.
7:30am A joyful moment was when the nurse, Jessica, said I should go ahead and order breakfast. I asked her what I could have as I was told clear liquids, jello, water, a clear ensure drink with protein, etc. and that's what was written on my board as well. But then Jessica was magical...she said the OB gave me the all clear for regular food since I wasn't on any meds or anything. YES!! Just another benefit of no drugs! So Tomek and I ordered my breakfast (scrambled eggs with cheese and a banana) food recommended by Jessica that would be safe still for delivery, as I didn't want to make myself puke during delivery either. And I was so happy to eat real food it just made my morning.
9:30am Up until this point not a whole lot was going on so when our back up doula Stephanie asked when we wanted her to come in we had just told her no worries sometime in the morning probably. I mean overnight was me just trying to sleep anyway. But after the CRB fell out I texted her. CRB out and suggestion of breaking my water next. So, Stephanie headed on over and we had her amazing support until 10pm before Patrick's delivery. Without her I don't think we would have progressed, we definitely wouldn't have known what to try to get stuff going, and we probably would have just had me lay in a bed or walk since we just couldn't think of the positions and even using the shower in the moment.
11:21am The goal of the CRB was to obviously create an increase in my labor symptoms but no such luck. I sat at 50% and 5cm dilated until 11:21am. At this point we had an amniotomy (AROM) performed. Basically what we all call breaking my water. So OB #1 returned and broke my water and said it should start increasing contractions and we are just going to wait and see how it goes.
12pm At noon we tried to use the peanut ball on my left side to instigate some movement but when I was given another cervical exam the only change noted was a 10% increase in effacement (So I was 5cm dilated and 60% effaced) and contractions were 3 minutes apart.
1:20pm Then we walked the halls to walk the baby out.
2:20pm I was checked again and we discussed pitocin for the first time being a possibility. I was 5cm dilated still, 65% effaced, -2 station (meaning baby could be felt but was still high), my temperature had went up to a 99.4, but baby’s heart rate was doing well.
However, we decided to try using a yoga ball/birthing ball at this time too and it didn’t go well. I wasn’t on it long before we noticed that baby’s heart rate was getting late decels (this means his heart rate was dropping not with the contractions which is normal but delayed to the contractions which is a concern as that's when it should be normalizing).
2:40pm So the nurse (Jessica) came in and had me get back in the bed for about 10 minutes of direct monitoring to ensure he was okay, and he was...he just was opposed to that positioning. So I was back on the bed using the peanut ball again (but on my right side) and through each contraction Tomek would apply counterpressure to my lower back. At first it sounds as though that was because I was experiencing back labor but I wasn't. It was actually because when a contraction hit I felt like I had nothing supporting my body to stop them. So when Tomek applied pressure it would keep me contained where I wanted, made me feel secure and safe, and supported by Tomek as well. We didn't attempt the yoga ball anymore for the labor process just to be safe but did use other positions and labor techniques.
4pm Due to the concern over the decels I was suggested to go for a walk for about 20 minutes at 4pm and then return to the bed (note the pitocin had been removed from suggestion due to the late decels as it isn’t safe for baby then).
4:30pm We returned to the bed and used the texas roll position over the back of the bed. I was checked again (though now we were getting weary of checks--the more checks after the AROM the more likely we are to cause an infection-- and the lack of change due to the fact that my water was broke so much earlier).
4:40pm We were happy to see my temperature returned to 98.5 and baby's position was now a -1. But there was still concern over no effacement or dilation progress despite the contractions seeming to pick up.
We can’t tell you exactly how they picked up as I wasn’t really able to be successfully monitored through the process but a funny anecdote from our labor process at this point…. I was going through really intense contractions and the nurse (Jessica-shift 2) saw my face during the contraction, she said “I would say that looks like a 6 face” and I laughed mid contraction and go, “Did you just say SEX FACE?!” Everyone in the room started laughing and couldn’t believe how I was going through this. They kept joking about the lady that was in fact laughing in natural labor in room 10. I couldn't get over sex face. Every time she was in the room and I had a contraction I was still laughing about it.
Now that the decels were leveled and my temperature was normal Pitocin was back on the table….and at a hard press to say the least. Our doula (Stephanie) asked the nurse (Jessica) if I would be allowed to try using the shower and the nurse said it was totally fine since I had been on monitoring for a while.
So Tomek and I got in the shower together (In case you were wondering him in swim trunks, me in a sports bra and boy shorts), he used his body wash on a washcloth to help me relax through contractions as that scent (Irish Spring) has been one I am intoxicated by since he started using it a while back. He held me again through swaying positioning as well as leaning through each contraction and the water going down my back during them made everything so much easier. I honestly felt like I was in the shower for maybe 10 minutes. I started to feel nauseous and dizzy (which happens when I am in the shower too long already) and so after a sip of sprite they helped me back to the bed. I found out we were in there for exactly an hour! WOW!
The hospital offers a tub option that they can set up in our room or the use of a shower. I chose the shower for a few reasons over the tub. The tub would mean trying to get comfy in a laying down position, Tomek may or may not be able to get in comfortably with me, and mostly I wasn't keen on maintenance men coming in to set it up and then having to return to tear it down before the delivery team could come in and deliver baby. Plus the shower kept gravity on my side and no extra pressure on my body anywhere that could cause more pain.
6:45pm So, 2 hours from when they tell me I can get in the shower I am being checked again...with the OB saying we have to see some change now, I’m sorry but you need pitocin otherwise. So I was checked and still only 5cm dilated but was effaced 80% (we were still at a -1 positioning and 98.6 temperature) and so though dilation didn’t change she was willing to give me another 2 hours since effacement had. Again...2 hours to see change or Pitocin it is!
The nurse (Felicia was back) even brought in the bag of pitocin at one point saying, “I’m not going to use this now just getting it ready just in case.” This is the only point in my entire labor that I cried. I was so afraid. I remember shutting down a little as nurses kept coming in and talking about “Pit” and how they could start it off low, increase hourly, etc. All I could do was lay there feeling as though I was abandoning my birth plan, that nothing was working the way it was supposed to, and more than anything what if I can’t handle pitocin contractions? I will need an epidural. When I talked to the doula (Stephanie) we had there at the time she let me know that we could get through it, and if we need an epidural we can get one. I just felt trapped. She kept attempting to discuss it with me and I was just getting more upset.
I wanted space to talk about it as Pitocin was my rock and the hard place was no change occurring! I went to use the restroom again and Tomek came in and I was crying against him scared. He said it was a low dose, he knew I could handle it if I had to. I told him I planned a labor mantra ahead of time, it was, “This is pain with a purpose, I can handle this pain!” But the truth was when contractions hit I didn’t even remotely think of this mantra. I instead went through the peak of each contraction saying in my head, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!” repeatedly. I didn’t even know how it came into my head but it was the thing that pushed me through each one. I told him I was to the point that the mantra was already running through my head to get me through these contractions, pitocin was going to be SOO much worse!
7:45pm I am washing my hands and the delivery nurse (Felicia) comes in and suggests a different position we hadn’t tried. She tells me to lean on the sink, squat down, have my husband hold my hips and rotate in a full circle around during the contractions...she called it the “Squat and Twerk.” We did this 4 times in the bathroom before returning to the bed.
8pm. At this point Felicia said it was Pitocin time. I turned to her and Stephanie and explained that I knew they couldn’t tell (the contraction monitors weren’t working with all my movement) but my contractions felt so much more intense now, and they were more frequent….PLEASE check me again first! So, she checked and I was 6cm dilated (YES!!!), 90% effaced, and on the brink of 0 positioning! This was perfect timing! This is what I needed to avoid Pitocin. I literally was on the edge of getting it but since we did see some progress I was given more time to continue my natural birth plan. I was so happy and I felt like I owed it all to the nurse Felicia and her suggestion of her very own “Squat and Twerk” position.
Each check was a little scary, it could mean the sweet satisfaction of continuing our way or the huge let down and defeat of having to accept pitocin and potentially an epidural. But this check was exactly what I needed. I turned to Felicia and immediately, “So this means I don’t have to do the pitocin?!” She laughed and said well I will check you again in around 2 hours, technically you have change so that is what we are expecting each time!
8:51pm my temperature was checked and again was back up to 99.1. Now they carefully watch my temperature during labor because if it spikes to a fever that is a sign of infection, they also check my “leakage” after the water is broken to make sure baby hasn't pooped (meconium) in the womb as that can also cause infections.
9:19pm I told them I wanted to do the “Squat and Twerk” again. I remember thinking that it caused the progress I needed and I needed that again. So I leaned against the bed squatting with Tomek holding my hips rotating them through each contraction. I felt like the contractions were more frequent but so much easier to handle in this position. In between each contraction we were talking about random things, I shared pictures of our Harry Potter halloween with Stephanie along with Patrick's HP nursery. We talked about what houses her and her kids are in, and lots about scuba diving. I honestly was having so much fun talking about things I am passionate about with them I didn't even notice that these contractions had really built up.
Each contraction from the beginning came and I would focus on my breathing, I would look at my focal point (Honeymoon picture and scuba diving snorkel), and just think about diving with my husband, the different fish, about God’s beautiful creations, and slowly breath in and out. Occasionally I made some noise OOOs and was told to make sure to make deeper noises. I honestly didn’t know how and so my brain went to what I do know...body relaxation techniques from my psychology courses and I just slowed everything down.
9:35pm While I was doing the “Squat and Twerk” positioning through contractions I looked up and our primary doula (Carli) had come. She initially wasn’t able to make it and so I was happily surprised to see her there. Now don’t get me wrong Stephanie was great and we had her there from 9am 9/15 through to 10pm. She gave constant support of us and our birth plan, shared different position ideas, and helped ease us through this very new and different process. We had a great time laughing and joking around with her and the other staff that my natural labor seemed to be made that much easier to handle.
So when I looked up from a position there was my primary doula….I just smiled! I was so happy and I am sure she knew it. Carli and Stephanie continued to support us until Stephanie left at 10pm (seriously she was there forever! Amazing women doulas!). Carli continued to help support us and her voice was just this natural relaxing tone that was perfectly placed. She was so soothing to me. We got me back on the bed (the squats are great for progress but the legs try to give if you do it for too long) as my body was doing a shaking thing--common to labor-- and I used both hands and knees positioning as well as the texas roll again.
9:50pm I said the magic words. They had told me about these magic words before but I thought it was a joke. “I need to use the bathroom, I feel like I need to poop.” WHAT!?! The doula exclaimed and we were getting the nurse in to check me again. I was checked again and I was 7cm dilated, 100% effaced, at a 0 and we decided it was time for more squats after that break.
By this point Felicia walks back in and takes the bag of pitocin back out of the room….talk about a visual victory! I felt so motivated by this. The contractions at this point were about a minute apart and I couldn’t handle the squats and so I went back to the bed. Tomek was a rockstar he kept counter pressure on my back while I was in the bed. I laid on my side and was trying to breath slowly through each contraction. Every time he or Carli talked to me I would focus on their voices and slow it down. She also kept running her fingers through my hair and it was so calming I felt like this was going so easily. Even with contractions at 1 minute apart we were joking, talking, and just having general conversations about all sorts of things.
Carli also just seemed to know exactly what would help. With each contraction she would say in a soothing voice, relax your face, feel your back muscles relax, your hands, etc. Tomek and I use guided meditations like this to get to sleep all the time so having her there playing with my hair while saying this...I immediately relaxed every single time. I was able to go from a full tense to slow steady breaths that would help with birth over all the muscle tightening.
11:30pm I was checked again and it was official...pushing time! I was 10cm dilated, 100% effaced, and complete! I was shocked. Wait really? How am I that far already? I feel fine? Well okay, i'm guessing this is the really sucky part people talk about then... So Felicia breaks down the end of the bed, stirrups are put into place (though they were only used when OB #2 came in), and Felicia (now our delivery nurse, though we wouldn't have imagined we would get to have her deliver but we were in labor long enough she was back. Heehee) told me how she wanted me to push.
I was to grab the underside of my thighs from the outside and push by pulling my upper half up and over my belly, holding for 10 seconds, and then release. My first attempt was a fail...which led to me laughing and joking with Felicia and Carli about it. I am so used to avoiding holding my breath when I felt contractions that I did everything leaned forward slowly breathed out and relaxed….heehee oops. But I quickly got the hang of it and we were on a roll.
Sunday 9/16 41w3d
12:30am 9/16 I was told to take a break. I was a little frustrated...I don’t want a break? I want to finish? Why do I need a break? Apparently my contractions had slowed from 1 minute to 2 minutes apart and so they wanted them to build back up. So back to laying on my side, husband applying counterpressure, and honestly this was the weirdest part of labor for me. I felt like I was in a daze. In between each contraction I officially stopped talking, I felt as though I was falling asleep. I lost track of time, I remember thinking how am I possibly going to have this baby right now? I could just take a nap instead?
Tomek attempted to talk to me a couple times and Carli explained to him I won't answer during this phase. I remember hearing it but also realizing I couldn't answer, it felt like they were so far away. Thank goodness she was there for this portion because if we hadn't had anyone the silence definitely would have freaked out Tomek and honestly myself too. Having her in the “distance” explaining to him this phase of labor helped me relax and accept it as a norm versus freaking out that it was happening.
However, they eventually got me back up to pushing and I was ready this time, I wanted to make sure my body did it, no more breaks! Breaks are for slackers! So, I was back to pushing. I was going full out, anytime they told me it was a good push I felt invigorated, and tried to one up that one. Then I heard them say they could see his head, and asked if I wanted to see, I couldn’t see even when I leaned forward. Oh well I thought, I will see him when he is out.
Then when they said they could see his head again and his hair I honestly didn’t believe them (Not only could they see his head but he opened his eyes and was staring at them so alert!), he can’t be that far out, it doesn’t even hurt yet! I am in between contractions and I think of something funny and I try to tell Felicia, Carli, and Tomek (I can’t remember what exactly it was, I think something scuba related) and they all say NO….PUSH!
Apparently his head was halfway out and I was just trying to talk to them about something (standard me practice apparently)! At this point they see the umbilical cord is wrapped very loosely around his neck (the OB explains this is actually pretty common and people tend to freak out about it's occurrence but it really is only a major concern if it is tightly wrapped around the neck area).
So, OB #2 moves it off without a problem (so much so I don't even know it happened until after he is born and she is explaining stitches)...however, after feeling it come off his face Patrick moved his posterior arm up and across his head (causing me to have a 3rd degree tear!) and so I am told another good push and I push as much as I can and he is here...WHAT?! How is he here, I feel fine.
Due to the cord wrapping around daddy had to cut the cord this way instead of waiting until he was laying on me like would typically occur.
I want to hold him, let me see him! He is placed on my chest and I am in awe that this little guy just came out of me. This was the look on my face when I first saw him. I was in shock, excited, and felt like I was going to cry (but wasn’t able to either)....We had opened up my gown so when he came they would remove the washcloth and immediately place him on me for skin to skin.
Before going into labor Tomek and I both agreed we did not want to see the birth. Tomek was going to stay by my head holding my hand. Well I can tell you that's not what happened. Tomek ended up wondering how they could tell what was a good push and so he started watching. He literally watched the beautiful birth of his son. Before labor I was grossed out by anyone wanting to watch but actually was quite happy that he chose to be that involved in our son's birth. Tomek was in awe of the whole process. He loved watching the progress. He talked about seeing the change in my belly during pushing and then watching the widening, seeing Patrick's head of hair, and then the whole baby...all of the process was just phenomenal to the both of us but even more so to him as he watched the entire process.
I felt a little pressure when some point of his body came out but truly nothing like what I thought I would feel based off of what people had shared with me. I was warned about a ring of fire pain that I just needed to push through...I never felt it. I had 2.5 hours of pushing baby out (though a required rest thrown in the middle) and I really didn't feel any pain….like I said just some pressure a couple times. (Now please don't assume all labors are like this...my high pain tolerance, strong mindset going in, and amazing support team is why all of this was a breeze. Some women obviously have much rougher experiences and I am not attempting to downplay labor...just share an honest account of my own).
Our little Patrick was born at 2:02am 9/16 and was absolutely perfect! He was put on me for immediate skin to skin, Tomek cut the umbilical cord (he had to do it before Patrick was placed on me due to the wrap around) pretty quick right when he came out and Patrick was placed on me for skin to skin. The OB barely tugged on the cord and the placenta easily followed.
During the final pushing Patrick pooped (which isn’t uncommon, it’s called meconium) and so the placenta was a greenish color from it being covered in it.
After this the OB told me that I received a 3rd degree tear (from his arm like I said above) and she was going to use local general anesthetic to repair. And though I didn’t feel the pain of the tear when she attempted to touch me 3 different times my entire body flinched. So, she told me that she suggested a spinal block (this is not an epidural, it is a shot in the spine though of a fluid that coats the nerves in the spine and lower back from reacting to the pain). I was totally open to it at that point as I knew none of the drugs they put in me now would get to Patrick. I had a Pitocin IV given (which is a required standard of practice after labor as it doesn’t create contractions but rather will prevent hemorrhaging), I had an amazing anesthesiologist (who switched shifts with her husband just so I wouldn’t have to have a male provider) that came in and gave me the spinal block. I had to sit up on the edge of the bed while she did it and Tomek said he is still in shock that I was sitting there with a 3rd degree tear, getting an injection in my back, joking around with the doctor and nurses!
Unfortunately because I had to sit up and do this I wasn’t able to keep Patrick on me for skin to skin and when the nurses offered to take him away I asked to substitute my husband instead. Thankfully they totally agreed. So, Tomek sat on the couch, took off his shirt, and did skin to skin with Patrick while I had to get the spinal block. As much as I wanted that to be me I was so overjoyed to see Tomek holding our son in his arms against his chest while I got stitched up.
I had 20 minutes of stitches I had to get which honestly I didn’t feel at all and was quite thankful for that. While having this done I heard the nurses take Patrick (not out of the room) for testing and they reported his APGAR of a 9! (That’s my little overachiever just like me! Standard would be a 7 and 8 and he was a 9). The APGAR measures Appearance (skin color), Pulse (heart rate), Grimace response (reflexes), Activity (muscle tone), and Respiration (breathing rate and effort).
During Patrick’s check my amazing hubby came over and kissed me telling me I was a rock star and how happy he was! I truly am blessed to have his love and support and for us to have our baby boy together now!
Then he was returned to my chest and I was just so happy! Our little blessing was here, doing perfectly, and seriously labor was not that bad! Every labor is different but in my case I was so lucky that it was a long labor but it wasn’t painful, it wasn’t impossible to go through, and truthfully I told Tomek I have most definitely experienced worse pain in my life than labor. I teased him and said I can’t even say oh well I went through labor trust me you don’t know pain, because mine was great...I was laughing and joking the entire time. I didn’t cry once, Tomek told all of our family and friends that I am clearly a robot, he is amazed by my high pain tolerance. I didn’t think it was that high but considering the highest pain face I got to was a 6 (according to the nurse, I don’t even think it was that really), obviously I do.
After Arrival:
First off the funny….Patrick was born at 8lbs 5.7oz. The diapers initially put on him were size newborn but they decided to switch him to size one while we were there. The size newborns were leading to this…..
Plumbers crack. Heehee The problem was that if the diaper was put on him tight enough to keep from his butt hanging out his area was getting too squashed. But if they made it looser it wasn’t right in the butt. So, switching to size 1 was the perfect solution (How is he so big!?!) We also noted he didn’t fit in the newborn outfit we had packed with us but some of the 0-3 were way too big. This is still the same at home. Some newborn clothes fit him (though most are too small) and some 0-3 (though most are too big).
So after Patrick’s arrival they did the typical checks. His heartbeat was a 90 and they were worried it was a little too low (they said they would like to see at least 110) so they decided they wanted to perform an EKG on him. The EKG came back from the cardiologist at Riley Children's Hospital and they said his heart rate was okay, that he is just a very chill little guy.
However, they said babies are born with a 2nd deviation in the heart regularly and there is a “range of acceptance” so to speak but he was at the highest end and so they were a little nervous about this. Due to this we were going to get a lot of other testing done including 2 blood draws (which came back with low platelets the 1st time and normal the 2nd time), temperature checks (he was too cold and so we had him placed in a warmer for a while, but eventually they said direct skin to skin with me only, which was good because this made his temperature go back to normal way faster and easier than the warmer did), and even an x-ray of his heart area as well which came back normal.
After lots of testing we were told that everything seemed to be coming back normal and he was doing perfectly. They still wanted a 2nd EKG done and had it scheduled for a 3rd morning. Thus, I was discharged and he was not. Though I was very concerned they worked with us to make sure we got to stay in our room the extra night with him.
At one point during this day a nurse and the OB #2 said that it was quite possible that his issues were from remaining in the womb the extra time and the placenta starting to work less efficiently. I was devastated...I felt like all of these issues he was experiencing were my fault because I chose to go an extra week.
My OB came to visit and check in on me and I told her this and she explained that my placenta was never checked so no one knows that but he is doing well and she too chose to let me go an extra week thinking I would go into labor before. She told me not to assume that is what caused any of this, as it is unlikely, and that sometimes this stuff happens, luckily Patrick and I were both doing great now and that's what matters the most!
Due to his low temperature Patrick didn’t get his first bath until midnight which I actually rather enjoyed as it gave time for the vernix to soak into his skin, which is good for him, rather than just wipe it off. Thankfully by the time he was ready for a bath it was all mostly gone (again soaked in) to begin with. I managed to get a picture of his first bath in the hospital as well. :) Can you tell the hubby was exhausted….He was such a trooper through labor and delivery!
Tomek's extra take away: Something Tomek suggested to share as a key take away from our experience is being in the moment. I shared with him where some people were posting updates on social media during their labor process. Now everyone can choose to do things the way they prefer but for us he (and I) loved not being attached to our phones with others. Why? Because we were truly able to just be in the moment with each other, supporting each other, and experiencing the sheer amazing blessing of birth together.
Birthday Gifts: The hospital was so sweet and to celebrate his birth they made a special couple’s dinner for Tomek and I (I had ribs, he had steak) with dessert and sparkling welch's juice, a 1st birthday cake for him, a hospital photo frame with his first picture in it that they take, and a mini scrapbook page they made of his prints and name! So very cute and we are beyond thankful for all of their support and love!
Tomek and I also got each other “push presents.” He got me this epic dragon skeleton (Huge HP fan) that I named Norbertta and I got him a Jack/Diet glass that said Tomasz Heil daddy to Patrick Michael 2018 on it.
The next day we were meant to leave in the morning but he didn’t get his circumcision until later. After getting his circumcision he had to be checked 2 more times and then we were good to go.
Unfortunately the nurse forgot to take the gauze off so we had to turn around and go back. She removed the gauze and he bled A LOT! More than the normal supposedly. So, we had him re-admitted, they were great again as our room was already being cleaned and they went ahead and gave us another room with him as he had to get another round of blood tests done (which came back low but acceptable), plus 2 more hours of watching his circumcision by the nicu nurse and then FINALLY late in the evening we were able to take him home!
So we left the hospital knowing his platelets were lower than normal, knowing it would be easier for him to get sick, and if he bled from anything (especially his circumcision) we had to add pressure for a few minutes and if it didn't stop then we had to hurry back to L&D. This definitely caused a lot of worry and stress for me when coming home and increased the intensity of my postpartum anxiety in the following weeks. This also meant when so many asked to come see him I said no. I said not yet for a few reasons, primarily his health being put in jeopardy by others just to say hi but also because I was still battling the hormone train and needed space from people asking me how we are doing as even when people asked in messages I would break down crying or just feel my heart rate skyrocket with anxiety. So I also didn't want to have to experience that in front of a bunch of people, so I stayed at home with him most days alone while Tomek went back to work.
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